-Start of story-
Imagine that you are in a farm watching a tomato talk to a baby lettuce.
Tomato: Baby lettuce, we are both vegetables in the same farm. We are both round and have life destinies to make people healthier.
Can you stop being green? You’re ugly.
Evidence? Annually we have a high-end, ultra-glamourous tomato show, where all veggies which are tomatoes or look like tomatoes roll on the catwalk.
They’re all red, not green.
Baby Lettuce: *shrivels in shame*
Then Mummy Lettuce came along and smacked the tomato on the head.
She told the baby lettuce to ignore the tomato, because the lettuce has different purposes relative to the tomato, in spite of being on the same farm.
And told baby lettuce to organise a beautiful lettuce show in future.
-End of story-
So can a tomato to tell a lettuce how to live?
Of course the tomato can! The tomato can say whatever it wants. However, is it smart for the lettuce to accept whatever the tomato says as truth?
Good intention is irrelevant. Offering advice in this context condescending.
So, if a baby lettuce were influenced by an evil-capitalist-tomato, what can you tell the baby lettuce?
To tell it–
- “No, you should not be like the tomato”;
- “This tomato is a huge bitch”; or
- “Let the tomato say/do whatever he/she wants, we ignore and will promote whatever values we believe in.”
It’s weird how people bash what they hate instead of using this energy to promote what they love.
In particular, I’d observed that most people react in accordance to option 2. They simply bash the polarising cause without promoting their own.
Usually, this is because lettuces do not have any idea what they are doing. They don’t even know they are lettuce.
Every time you use the word “should”, you rob both yourselves and others of possibilities.
Every time you use the word “should”, check the source. Someone, somewhere has imputed certain values into you and entangled them with your emotions, to suit their purposes.
Advice can always be offered with consideration of the individual’s background and context. Permission can always be sought before offering advice.
Let the tomato live out her life without putting down the lettuce. And let the lettuce live out his/her life by being a lettuce.