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When do you hold back your charm?

Firstly, watch:

Yesterday I was going to RG with Yeow in the evening, and I was telling her about this song (which she wrote and sang).

Anyway in Yeow’s own words, this song–based on true story–is about:

“The song “(Did You Want Me) By Your Side” came out of an experience where I felt intensely threatened by someone who was very forward in competing for the affections of the one I was dating, and those thoughts were affecting our relationship, but the man never did assure me I was the one he wanted to be with, sometimes even comparing me with her.

Although in real life it was not his fault, this was the experience this song was based upon. I hope that it would make people feel less bad about having terrible feelings towards someone they feel threatened by, because hey, you’re not alone, you’re not evil it’s normal haha!

And that’s what music is about isn’t it? Sharing taboo feelings so you don’t feel so alone. ^_^”

I said I really liked this song because even though I couldn’t identify with the story, I felt that she must have felt damn sad because of the stupid boy, and with all the elements combined I found her very charming! Then Yeow sort of said she held back her charm because she wanted the visuals to be pretty, polished and perfect.

If she had wanted to go all out to charm, she would have toned down her perfectionist sentiments. Like sing her heart out live or something, and before singing tell the real bitter-sweet story that inspired this song.

So when does one hold back his/her charm? It’s when (A) You are already committed to someone else;  (B) When you are committed to a certain alternative ideology (aka “charming” is “cheating”/ “charming” is not “ethical”/ perfectionistic standards) and/or (C) self-doubt.

Vulnerability + sincerity perhaps, can be a type of huge charm, as it connects. Consideration for others is another type. The last type of charm is probably confidence, and the higher version of it is confidence inspired in/ by a vision.

This entry was posted in: Expression


Hi! This is Wan Wei and some affectionately call me WW. I help people remember you. Also Editor in Chief at IKIGUIDE (, Singapore's first online portal on personal branding.

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