[A caveat: you decide if this is a satire or not. :P]
Hello! Today I am going to blog about the 2 steps to getting a Singaporean boyfriend. ♡ Turns out that there are less steps to getting a Singaporean boyfriend than a Finnish one, huh!
Oh I want to address one point here. One reader actually asked me, “Aren’t these guide-to-getting-a-partner posts about stereotypes?” My answer is–“Of course they are!” But I’m inclined to argue that there are truths to most stereotypes, especially when these stereotypes are about ideals in any culture and society.
Why? Especially for Singapore, for example, it is the mass media which controls such gendered ideals, making them predictable. Singapore has a relatively strong state-controlled mass media, which then propagates the state ideals of gender and romance.
Therefore, I would posit that it is logical to consider fitting oneself into the Singaporean state ideal in order to attract a Singaporean boyfriend! Of course, if it is too much effort to do so, you should just forget about Singaporean boys, change target and be happy! The world has so many cute boys anyway.
For the convenience of my global readers, here is the background of gender ideals in Singapore for your better understanding:
Gender ideals in Singapore
The Singapore society is widely regarded as patriarchal. When it comes to gender roles, strong state ideals of gender are propagated via the mass media, for instance through local drama series.
Yes, you heard me right, we do subscribe to pretty strong Singaporean state ideals of a man and a woman, defined as the following:
- The ideal Singaporean man is positioned as the head of the household; while
- The ideal Singaporean woman is positioned primarily as the child bearer and nurturer. Even if she places great emphasis on her career, she is also expected by society to take really good care of her family.
To institutionalize these ideals, Singaporean men have to undergo two years of compulsory military service at the age of 18 by law. Women, while exempted, are educated to believe that they can do their part to contribute to nation-building by giving birth and raising the next generation of Singaporeans.
This is on top of women being encouraged by the government to participate in the labour force. The nuclear family comprising of one man, one woman and their children is given priority in all legal benefits ranging from public housing, childcare subsidies and maternity leave.
Homosexuality, children born out of wedlock, and cohabitation are still taboo topics, and the Singaporean state only legally endorses a marriage between a man and a woman.
Teo (2007) also points out that in order to preserve and reproduce the traditional nuclear family, the state has
“set up national matchmaking agencies, a ministry devoted to promoting marriage and childbearing, and a mandatory savings plan that secures housing ownership for married couples, among other institutional mechanisms.” (p.427).
Yes you’d heard me right! There is a Singaporean state-controlled matchmaking agency too, called the Social Development Network. Check it out if you are curious! ^^ ♡
The 2 Steps to getting a typical Singaporean boyfriend.
Step 1: According to Lee et al, 1999, the ideal traditional Singaporean woman is
“gentle, soft-spoken, yielding, passive and relies on intuition and feeling rather than logic” (p.317).
The traditional ideal still applies to modern Singapore today. So, basically to attract a typical Singaporean man, you should:
- look demure and pretty;
- be sort of submissive;
- behave in a soft-spoken manner; and
- Be relatively un-opinionated. If you have opinions, take note not to be outspoken! You should appear mild in public.
Step 2: Wait for a Singaporean guy to approach you!
That’s it! 🙂
I can guarantee that if you follow these two steps, you’d get a “typical” Singaporean boyfriend for sure. (y) Or at least not do too badly.
P.S. Actually guys are really relatively less complicated than girls. People usually tell me that girls are choosers. If this is really true, remember girls–to not give your power away too easily, if at all. 😉 Choose wisely!
P.P.S. A reader left this comment on my FB:
“I think the writer missed what seems to be a critical tactic; “act like you’re slightly annoyed, and also retarded when talking to your potential boyfriend” – can be supplemented with posting IG and FB photos of you making faces like you’re retarded, just to tempt him.“